Kory Wolf, Playgirl New Years Eve Special, 1984 - Sun Jun 30, 1994
Top Secret! Do Not Share! Kory Wolf’s Kave!
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( ͡- ͜ʖ ͡-) o O (Keep scrollin!)
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You’ve unlocked a chat transcript with Kory Wolf!
Warning, you will experience a soft penis soon.
CONFIDENTIAL:
You:
Hi, thanks for inviting me. I know you have the HD file with better graphics and colors, so hand it over. I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll…
90s.Zone:
- Ha ha. Hey nobody can read this right?
- I love how you tied in Kory’s last name into that joke, visitor.
- :)
- Here’s the HD copy of Kory Wolf’s nude fold out.
Kory Wolf Nude, Ultra Wide and Not Quite Hard.
You:
Stunning, thanks. Say, did you scan this yourself?
90s.Zone
- Sorry, your message is 𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐝.
- To make up for this technical snafu, I am uploading a new image.
- This is an animated gif, visitor:
Your gif has been rendered, King Crimble!
You:
Thanks, I’ll zip & download this to my USB dongle.
90s.Zone
- Do not be a fool. I will suck you dry,
You:
Sorry, what?
90s.Zone
- You probably mean to say ‘download’ them to your USB dongle. And even then, that’s incorrect. At least here in 1994.
You’ve revealed your true nature and our interactions end here.
- It’s a real too because you seemed like somebody with juicy potential, so I was going to show you an exclusive nude hologram of Troy McClure or Gargamel Winslow.
You’ve disappoined the entire 90s Zone team.
You:
I’m a novice! Give me another chance! I’m cool with other stuff! I love Braveheart 1994, you said?! Don’t give up on me yet!
90s.Zone
- fine.
- I was raised on the streets of Baltimore. The streets are all I know. If you want my respect, prove that you’re not a dongle-sucking pussy who saves loose zip files to the Dorkintosh Desktop:
As a mortified web surfer, I am ready to redeem my status in the eyes of the webmaster!
- Complete the above streaming experience.
- When finished, leave a comment containing only the following phrase:
"Kory Wolf howls alone."
Your chat has ended.
Context provided from future by Gargamel Winslow: